Halloween is right around the corner, Sluts. That means it’s almost time for carving pumpkins, gorging on candy and fall treats, and of course, slutty halloween costumes! So, do you need a costume idea for this all hallows eve? Look no further, babe! Our resident Slutstrologist has you covered. It’s all spelled out in the stars.
Aries (March 21 – April 19)
Light-hearted, childlike rams need a similarly youthful, whimsical Halloween costume to match. Look no further than Alice In Wonderland, the ultimate daydreamer. Looking for a more gender neutral option from Louis Carroll’s tales? How about the devious, mischievous Cheshire Cat.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
You’re a history buff, brainy Taurus, and you don’t mind dropping a little coin on an extravagant costume. Keep it political (and historically accurate) with a Suffragette costume. Start crafting your protest sign now. Wanna keep things current? Dust off that white bonnet and red cloak for a Handmaid’s Tale costume that’ll turn heads. Looking to show a little more skin? Shimmy into a skimpy flapper costume a la Daisy Buchanan.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
The perfect costume for the twins of the zodiac? Enlist a buddy to help you bring to light the gruesome Grady Twins from Kubrick’s The Shining. Looking for something a little less bloody?Geminis are divas – facts are facts. Why not embody the biggest diva of all time, Miss Mariah Carey? All you need is a black dress, some black gloves and shades, and some big ol’ diamonds.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
You’re the practical planner of the friend group, Cancer. No matter how last minute your costume is, you want to look put together. Dress for the weather as Dame Cruella De Vil in a spotted fur coat. Bonus points if you have a pack of shirtless pups on your heels. Feeling a little more sweet than salty? After all, cancers are the softhearted angel babies of the zodiac. Show your soft side and throw on a white slip, angel wings and a halo. Amen!
Leo (July 23 – August 22)
You’re the star of the show, Leo, so use Halloween to step out like your fave celeb. Nicki? Rih? Kimberly K? Recreate your fave celeb look, and get ready for the paparazzi.
Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
Overachieving Virgo, you’ve probably been planning your perfect costume since July. The best pick for you? Fellow brainiac Hermione Granger, or a member of her ragtag Gryffindor crew. Virgos love to be niche, and show off their specialize knowledge. Show everyone you’re the queen of the fandom with a Daenerys Targaryen costume. Baby dragons not included.
Libra (September 23 – October 22)
You’re the life of the party, Libra, so bring it to the dance floor in a 90’s rave kid inspired ensemble. Strap on a mini backpack and some extra high platform boots, and don’t forget some candy necklaces. Looking for something spookier? Why not make your mark as Carrie in her signature blood-drenched prom dress. (Everyone can see your dirty pillows!)
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
You’re the sexiest sign of the Zodiac, Scorpio, and you have a definite dark streak. Your costume? The classic suave and sexy vampire. For bonus points, pay homage to the O.G. sexy vampire Vampira herself in a plunging black gown and lots of hairspray. Speaking of a black gown, another prime costume option for Scorpio is the lovely Mrs. Morticia Addams.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
You’re a natural born traveler and explorer, Archer, so it’d almost be a waste if you didn’t go as short-short clad Lara Croft. Another option? Suicide Squad’s own Harley Quinn is another go-to choice for Sagittarius.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)
A creature of habit, you like to stick to your roots Capricorn. Stay true to your earth-sign identity and dress up as a creature of the animal kingdom. A goat might be a little too on the nose, so why not pick a forest fawn or a big cat? Before anyone says anything, lingerie and animals ears totally count as a costume.
Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)
You’re a sci-fi hero/ine at heart, other-worldly Aquarius. Your head in the stars makes you the perfect Eleven from Stranger Things, or Rey from The Force Awakens. Got a whole group with you? Why not recreate the crew from Ghostbusters (original or remake).
Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
You’re a nostalgic at heart, Pisces, and you love a throwback costume more than anyone. Go plastic in a Mean Girl’s costume (I know you already have the whole movie memorized) or suit up as member of the Spice Girls. Bonus points if you get the whole gang involved.
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